The pages of my passport wallpapered with Chile entry and exit stamps. My last exit was painless.
95 countries do NOT require a visa to enter Chile, except Australia – I blame ScoMo.
I wandered back through the Santiago arrival hall hoping to perhaps recognise the bastard who approached me on arriving. Then I went to the car park area where I was met, I would have recognised the car as it was a black BMW sedan with a dent on the off side rear. No joy. Then the penny dropped: the man who greeted me and then apparently phoned the hotel, in truth was phoning the driver! So he said something along the lines of “ quickly drive to the car park waiting areas, I am bringing a victim”!
I am sitting in the LATAM VIP lounge, the Qantas flight from Sydney has literally just touched down as I write, on time. Two more humans travelling with wagging, joyful dogs this morning! If this was Europe or the USA, I reckon the dogs would be allowed in the lounges for VIP passengers.
It has been my universal experience when travelling internationally, that the flight check-in, provokes a moderate degree of anxiety. On this trip to Chile, the process has verged on panic, despite flying Business Class.
Even for a domestic flight, LATAM recommends arriving 2 hours before departure, nevertheless I am processed in less than 20 minutes! I am sure a major factor is that I am leaving from a smaller domestic city airport! Much less traffic.
However, getting back to the check in desk, as I said, my passport is taken, the clerical staff key in my information, then follows several minutes of intense staring at screen, biting lower lip, looking at me over top of glasses, back to staring at screen, more biting of lower lip, twisting fingers through long hair, then leaning across to the agent at the adjacent desk. Both look at my screen, chat and point, more looking at me…. Then thank god, the keyboard is tapped and my boarding pass is printed. I am convinced there is a red flag that pops up against my name in all Chile customs, immigration and travel software.
A fluffy white poodle lap dog type, enthusiastically barks and romps around my legs, I turn to see an older couple with luggage and empty animal transport cage, piled up on their luggage trolley. They entice “Fifi” into the cage, with a silk cushion mattress, slivers of liver treats and then load mutt and cage onto the carousel.
The flight from Punta Arenas to Santiago was uneventful in the LATAM 787 Dreamliner. I am only human and as a devout agnostic, I was moderately nonplussed when the lady in 1L window seat, (I being in 1J ) performed a furtive sign of the cross, as we lifted off and again on touch down! I suspect a retired flight attendant?
Sadly this trip at least for the first half was characterised by a smouldering degree of persistent anxiety! I was constantly vigilant, checking that I had my phone and passport secure and IMPORTANTLY that I adopted a routine of methodically placing them in the same pocket in my backpack. If I became rushed or flustered, this invariably caused me to “misplace” my documents or passport and I would become positively panic struck as I searched every pocket of my pack!
This was my fifth Backroads trip. However, all the ground work before I left in the past has been done by a very efficient knowledgeable, travel agent , since retired, and I now surrender to the fact that I will need to arrange my future International trips through a Travel Agent.
Who would have thought that this man who prides himself on his forensic ability to detect scams, swindles and tricksters, should fall to pick up this – an eye watering catastrophe.
It needs a preamble to even try and excuse, justify the sequence of events! I recommend strongly reading the previous posts before this one. It’s my first trip OS for 3 years, the first not organised down to the minute by a travel agent. Hence the Chile e-visa fiasco which dogged me from day 1 until I escaped the clutches of the local immigration authorities and left me a quivering, frightened wreck of a human being. Still in a state of panic, I headed to the exit, not bothering to change some basic currency.
As I entered the arrival area, there were the usual drivers with signs to pickup their clients. A middle aged respectable man with an official looking lanyard, standing actually in FRONT of the security rail, designed to separate the arriving passengers from their welcoming, rather than behind, approached me and in excellent English ask me if I was being collected and which hotel I was going to? I said yes, I was going to the hotel Matilda. He said I will show you where the pick up point is so I followed him. What follows is a very impressive scam, which as bad luck would have it caught me in a extremely fragile state of mind. You’ll understand clearly the process he adopted, and it became obvious to me once I realised what happened, quite quickly.
I acknowledged his help ( yes he was “employed to welcome international visitors! “) We walked along until he stopped and explained that he could not see any driver from Hotel Matilda. He said he would phone the hotel and brought up the web site of what looked like the hotel Matilda, which he showed me. He dialled, spoke at length, then handed his phone to me! At the end of the line , a man, who I assumed was on the Matilda front desk, explained that his driver had a car problem, could I take a taxi, get a receipt and I would be reimbursed! So we walked further to the park and were met by a young man and a limousine.
We set out, very chatty driver. Arrived and I brought out my phone to swipe. He apologised his payment device required an actual plastic card! So I swiped and verified! He then said “my machine is not working I will park around the corner and come back to the hotel.” He supplied a receipt for $US 25 . I carried my bags and receipt into the hotel and I NEVER SAW HIM AGAIN!
Whilst checking in, my phone sent me a notification that I had debited an amount of $Aus xxxx.xx ! Jesus wept!
I contacted the NAB 24 hour card line! Helpful but pessimistic! We will try he said when you return. Change your PIN now ( which I did) and he lodged a disputed transaction for me and recommended I cancel the card when back in Australia, A potential hassle being overseas.
The hotel staff contacted police, who were totally uninterested and/or disinterested- take your pick! The whole scenario and police total lack of action, brought back memories of the stolen iPhone whilst travelling in Brazil more than 10 years ago
The amount, to give you a clue, was akin to a drop in my share portfolio over a day. My financial planner at those times in the past I had emailed, phoned or SMS him about such sudden falls, would patiently explain, that these were just paper changes, virtual, imaginary and any other synonym that you care to use, meaning that I hadn’t LOST any money! Well let me tell you, SIR, I think that advice needs a Royal Commission.
In summary, I wandered the streets of Santiago, Sunday night, a severe migraine, and so distressed by the catastrophic, accumulation of events over 48 hours that I contemplated throwing in the travel towel and giving Chilean customs the satisfaction of catching the next flight back to Australia! “I’m too old to travel especially to the third world anymore…enough is enough! “
But after another day, a good night sleep Monday, changing some Chilean Peso Monopoly money , I am better!
In a few days time I’ll send a link to a GoFundMe link to offset my loss!
The Receipt
The only other scam that involved money was the saga of the “ tea sampling and drinking ceremony” in Shanghai. That was also several years ago at a Parkinson’s neurological conference. However in the end I had a delightful time with several young Chinese allegedly wanting to improve their English. The money they asked was not that much, but not expected as I assumed, lulled into a friendly interaction with “locals”.
The Chilean NBN in Punta Arenas. Malcolm Turnbull was seconded as the inaugural consultant, I believe?
I have arrived successfully in Punta Arenas. I negotiated the domestic air terminal in Santiago. I have confirmed my bus ticket to Ushuaia on Friday, joining the Backroads tour Sunday . Punta Arenas is a delightful village which I will explore tomorrow Thursday.
I am in a much better place mentally! But having said that the sad thing is that one only becomes more suspicious and even paranoid about ones’ fellow man, especially when travelling in a third world country.
A private tour with driver and guide a young lad called Leonardo, who was fairly knowledgeable with a good grip of the English language. We drove to a winery nearby, which I had some impressive wines. We then drove all the way down to the coast and the town of Valparaiso, which is the second largest city in Chile and was once the major marine port. Its size and significance was reduced significantly by the construction of the Panama Canal. So here follows pictures of this city, which has been declared a UNESCO world heritage site, only the old part.
As with all major capital cities, the modern area is same-same world wide, the original settlements are fascinating but sadly in a degree of decay and poor maintenance inversely proportional to the country’s wealth.
Indeed my pictures have all been carefully manipulated to minimise the garbage and graffiti that suffocate footpaths and walls.
The local fishing boats are all painted with the same scheme At the winery I visited ! I just thought it was a good picture!
A few pictures of the Matilda hotel in Santiago, recommended to me by David from Swimming. Full marks! It’s quaint and charming, although it has three flights of stairs, but no elevator. The rooms are basic the bed clean, the showers perfect. Staff are very friendly.
The libraryThe gardens
The dining room and bar, although having said that it’s only breakfast all other meals are eaten out
Reasonable flight across the Pacific to Santiago- QANTAS Dreamliner – truely a flat bed! However my life long sleeping position of flat on my belly , flat pillow, head facing to the left or right , is after 75 years, catching up with me as I have a mild neck ache, like a wry neck most mornings. I need to change pillow!
But that is, or was, the least of my worries! The saga of the Chile visa was about to explode at the immigration desk! I have occasionally watched the TV so called “Realty” shows including the airport immigration/custom version! Let me tell you, it’s real!
In sordid summary, the printed Chilean visa I handed to the youthful immigration lad, was an acknowledgment and summary of my application, not the final approval ! He fiddled with his PC screen, went to chat with another person, came back and using Google translate, on his phone said “ we need to talk to my boss”.
Well in a crowded office, the boss after several minutes and me explaining the situation, as well as evidence of my itinerary and flights in and out etc, said, hand on his pistol, “you are not to enter Chile without a visa.”.
There followed a mind numbing silence….. his hand tightened on his gun…….”we must put you back in the next plane to Sydney!
I must have obviously looked distressed, I said I was very upset and could I use the toilet! And I genuinely did have a need! He waved me down the corridor ( no chains, handcuffs or escort)
Upon my return I sat outside the office, relieved in one sense only. He beckoned me into his office and said sternly “Mr Graham, I have decided to grant you a transit visa! If you ever come back to Chile, you MUST have a visa. “
In retrospect I am certain that the whole exercise was to scare me shitless ( mission accomplished) and he always intending to let me in!! The giggles from the other people in the office at my obvious discomfort and final relieve as I genuflected, bent down to kiss his feet and crawled out on my knees, backwards, was prove positive as to the success of his mission.
Please be reassured that since then I have done due diligence and have confirmed yet again that Australians do not need a Visa to enter Argentina as a tourist, unless the rules change in the next 36 hours
The back garden, at least part of it at the Matilda boutique hotel
I, as we Australians so delightfully turn a phrase, am a “grey nomad”. But the stress of several hiccups on this my first trip overseas for 3 years has only turned my thinning grey hair, white, hence forth after this first day , I will be a “Snow Goose “.
My domestic leg, Adelaide to Sydney departs at 6 am, I arrive with plenty of time up my sleeve and approach the “Business International Check In”desk .
Most of us would agree that any interaction between a customer and the “customer service officer”, is flagged instantly, not by the first words, but the “emoji “ of the agent. Now granted we both have been awake since at least 4am, a possible gracious justification for a dour, sour face on a gender neutral assistant and an opening statement hand extended for passport “where are you flying to this morning?” A slightly chilly reception to a flight to Chile!
As I write these words, I acknowledge they suggest I am at best an aging, grumpy somewhat suspicious customer, at worst psychotically paranoid! The reader is entitled to make up their own mind!
As the officious officer keys in my details, I am asked for my copy of visa for Chile! Did I hear correctly? Jesus wept, I should have worn my hearing aids! Yes I heard correctly! Having reassured myself 6 weeks ago that as a transit tourist I did not need a visa … it was explained to me “ new recent rule”!! This is my first trip in 3 years and the first not organised and orchestrated by a competent travel agent, obviously!
My atrophic brain was smothered in a tsunami of emotions. I vaguely registered the words “ I am unable to book you or accept your luggage without a valid visa “. My Instant initial thought was to swoon to the floor, landing over the luggage conveyor belt and feign a major epileptic fit.
As the first rays of the sun crept over the Adelaide Hills, I am sure it also dawned on the check in agent, that I was of an age when cardiac implants were the norm AND he/she was in fact, interacting with a Qantas FF, that’s “Frequent Flyer” … not just any old FF but “Platinum “ .
I was informed I could apply for an e-visa and told to go away and come back having applied on line – I was supplied with a handwritten link . Leaning and trembling on the glass fence around the lift well on the departure floor , I keyed in the link on the iPhone, to be presented with an obvious condensed confusing page in a foreign language ! Conflicting thoughts raced through my brain : forget about the bloody holiday! Throw in the towel, give away your $15000 of accumulated Qantas vouchers over 3 years and the $12000 Backroads Patagonia adventure , catch a taxi home , collect Tosca my “already missing him, “ border collie and go back to bed!
I did a reset and cautiously approached a different Qantas services agent! Chalk and Cheese! – Let’s just book you and your luggage to Sydney, you have a 4 hour layover, so get to the lounge and have breakfast , coffee and fill in the form at your leisure! What an agent!
As luck would have it, I was able to fill in the form on my phone , print out the email acknowledgment, whilst sitting quietly in the Adelaide lounge, ready to front the check in agent at Sydney’s international terminal – I can hear your collective sigh of relief! I was back in control, hallelujah….
So domestic sector flight all plain sailing (or soaring if you prefer an aviation metaphor). At baggage collection carousel 2, engulfed in a sea of rainbow signs, flags and Pride Posters, I patiently wait and wait and wait…. No luggage ! Slight panic worthy of a simple swoon rather than a full blown seizure. I meander down to Qantas Baggage “complaints” desk ! Here I acknowledge the gender, a delightful reassuring woman takes command. I bring up “Find My…” app on the iPhone. It places my luggage , with its embedded I- tag, thankfully at least in Sydney airport Terminal 3 , somewhere between McDonalds, Krispy Crème Donuts and the Prada Leather shop! She disappears and after an inordinately worrisome long time reappears to say “ no luck” but again recommends I head over to the international terminal , book in and she takes my number! Praise the lord , she phones within 10 minutes, luggage found and she will book it through to Santiago for me! I am on a roll!
Negotiating check in to Santiago is painless! Passport, printed copies of COVID 19 international vaccination certificate, printed acknowledgment of Chile e-visa! Hair resumes normal grey colour. I am asked to scan a QRS code which takes me to the Chilean dept of agriculture! I turn on google translate and successfully answer NO to various questions – such as “ are you a terrorist, have you been in contact with anyone with Monkey Pox”?
I purchase a couple of bottles of Liqueurs to collect on the homeward journey, I am frisked by a very handsome Indian man at security and I am now sitting in the lounge, relieved, reassured but still missing the bloody dog!
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